Raffle Eve

As I was sort of watching Grey's Anatomy tonight, I was thinking about our raffle tomorrow and how I still have a few pages of tickets to print out and cut up.  Some people had suggested that I just buy actual tickets and assign everyone a number and then just write a number on the appropriate amount of tickets.  I had already thought of that, but I didn't want to just tear apart tickets and I didn't want just a number to win.  I wanted to type every one's name on a spreadsheet.  I wanted to print out their name 1, 12, 50, 100, however many times.  And I wanted to look at each of my family, friends, strangers, fellow adoptive parent's name and think about what they have done for me.  So that's what I did.  And it felt good not to do it the easy way.  It felt right to take the time to say a little prayer for every person who is helping me bring my son home.  Because I'm so, SO grateful!

This adoption has changed me.  Just like my infertility changed me.  Both have made me much more appreciative of what I have, especially of my husband and children.  I've learned so much and grown so much the past 5 years and my difficulties having a family has shown me that I'm a much stronger person than I ever realized.  And now this raffle has taught me another lesson.  It's ok to ask for help.  I REALLY struggle with this.  But people want to help.  They want to share in your joy and happiness and success.  I'm just so grateful tonight.  And I'm so incredibly happy that God led me down this road less traveled.